Thursday 15 August 2013

Garage bedrooms and faking it.

This was a quickie right before I woke up one morning. How it starts and ends eludes me.

I'm in a garage, but there is a fairly large doorway that leads to the rest of the house. I'm lying on a blow-up mattress, covered in an old, lumpy sleeping bag, lying so that I'm staring into the bright doorway and hall. The garage is dark, cold and musty, and as I lay there, I can see the golden warmth of the rest of the house. My mother trudges into my garage bedroom, obviously exasperated. "Well, you might as well come in." I get excited. She asked me to come in and join the rest of the family! As I stand, I get hit with vertigo and stumble into the wall. I look up at her guiltily. She rolls her eyes and storms away. We're suddenly standing in a bedroom where the whole family is sleeping in a big bed together. My mother says something about me faking my vertigo. I'm suddenly furious and mortified. "Fuck it." I leave the warmth and glow of the family's communal room. I go back to my cold, dark garage alone. I lay down on my bed now facing away from the door and staring at the dark, grey cement wall. I can hear her talking about me to everyone else. I wake up feeling sick with embarrassment, humiliation and anger. It takes me a while to realize this one is actually a dream.

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